I've been wondering if I was leaving my girls behind, what with all of this healthy living and loss of a toddler (cannot even believe that what I've lost is more than what my daughter weighs) on my part. I've been worried that I was abandoning a group that has been good to me.
Fat girls bond over limit clothing choices, Lane Bryant not making a-line skirts (pencil skirts not flattering people), big boobs, discrimination for our size and how much we hate being where we are. We encourage each other to leave the club behind. Nothing beats going in to your favorite fat girl store and realizing little there fits any more and having the sales people who have seen your progress cheer you on. Skinny girls may criticize your food choices or your cellulite, but fat girls love you for who you are, in good times and in bad.
I've realized I'm not leaving them however. No matter how much weight I lose, no matter how shapely my calves are (and they're looking good), I won't forget where I've been. I will look past a person's size to see who they really are and I will speak out when others don't. I will share what I've gone through, because everyone should know that anyone can do it. Even if I never lost another pound, I know that I've accomplished so much.
Apparently I've been glowing lately. People at work have commented about my weight loss. The woman at the Gap who saw me just a few weeks ago trying on the new fits of jeans and being disappointed that they didn't fit, saw me today own a pair of khaki's. She and I shared tips for healthy meals and encouraged each other. Knowing that how I'm feeling on the inside shows on the outside is just one more push to keep going. The other thing that helps is everyone's encouragement here. I've never been one for meetings, but I have always felt at home in a digital world. It doesn't surprise me that this is the place that has helped it all finally work for me. I want to thank everyone who encourages me. You make me not want to let you down, and I know that I would not be losing weight if it weren't for the Shredheads, Julie, Christina and everyone else. Thank you, really, I mean it.